Building Communication into Everyday Routines

Life at home can be hectic. We parents have all been there. Either we have worked all day, or all week, outside the home, or as a full-time caregiver in the home. And there are still dishes and laundry and cleaning to be done, bills that need to be paid, home repair, yard work, grocery shopping, errand runs, school drop off and pick up, field trips, appointments. Even writing this list is exhausting! And on top of all that, and a million other things, we are trying to raise our kids. 

When we have newborns, we go through the natural routines and learn pretty quickly to “read” our baby’s needs. We can tell the difference between a hungry cry, a dirty diaper cry and an “I’m tired and need a nap” cry. This is so because infants rely on us for everything. They not only can’t talk, but they also can’t walk or crawl, feed themselves, communicate that they are too cold or too warm, or anything. So we focus a great deal of our time and attention on them.

As they grow and develop, they begin to gain some independence. We can put them in a highchair to eat, let them spend some time on a blanket or a play enclosure so that we can get a little bit done. They start to learn to sit up, crawl, stand, walk, and eventually talk. With each new independent step, we as parents feel a little freer to get things done around the house and to not just rely upon nap time to run around frantically trying to complete tasks.

So, the older the child gets, the more independent they become, especially when they start talking. Now they can show or tell you about their wants and needs, likes and dislikes. But what happens when you have a child who is developing typically but they don’t seem to be communicating as efficiently. Sometimes this calls for some intervention. If you are concerned, you can get them evaluated by a speech and language pathologist (like us!) and they can let you know if there is reason to be concerned and what might be done. This is a great path, and we highly recommend it, especially if it will ease your mind. There are plenty of reasons why speech may be delayed. Perhaps the child has suffered some mild hearing loss due to frequent ear infections. With hearing loss comes speech delay. Maybe the child has older siblings who talk for them, and they don’t need to talk as much. Or it could be just an idiopathic delay with no real known cause. Whatever the reason, a consultation with a trained professional can often lead you on a path for improvement.

For sure one of the suggestions you will hear is to take some real, dedicated time each day to build language opportunities into your everyday routines. How do you do this? Good questions. Here are some tips and tricks that anyone can use to help their littles gain better communication skills.

1. Carve out time each day to spend one-on-one, down on their level. Get ready to get down on the floor and to just talk to them. Talk about their toys: “Look at the yellow block! Can we stack it on the green block?” And when you say each item, hold it up so they can see it, relate the color and item you are saying with the actual object. Hold the item up to your mouth as you enunciate the word. Show them how your mouth forms each word. Repeat the word several times. Ask them if they can say it. Give them time to say it. Resist the urge to jump in right away to fill the sound void. Wait a few seconds to see if they will repeat. If they do…praise them. Give them a hug, tell them they did it, repeat it again. If they don’t repeat it, try again. If after a couple of attempts they are still not repeating it, move on to something else. Let them get used to hearing you talk through what you are touching, what you are playing with. It will rub off!

2. Read to them. You can’t start too early with this one. Get them used to sitting with you, looking at books, turning the pages, looking at pictures, reading the words. But go beyond just reading. Stop on the pages and point things out. Discuss the animals, their colors, their actions, their sounds. Observe and note objects. Do everything you can to talk through your thoughts aloud. Your child is watching and listening. They are like little sponges. What you do and say has a huge impact on them.

3. Let them help you with everyday activities. Put the clean laundry basket on the ground. Give them mismatched socks. Speak what you are seeing. Say, “Hey you have dada’s blue sock!” Let them watch you do the dishes. “Oh! Look at this spoon! We use a spoon for eating.” Repeat yourself often. Ask them questions. Hold up a spoon and ask them what it is. If they say spoon, or some approximation, praise them, and repeat it again. “That’s right!! Good job! This is a spoon!” And hold it up to your mouth so they see you saying it, forming the word with your mouth, and they begin to associate that object with the spoken word.

4. Chatter away when you are out and about. On a walk? Point out the cars and their colors, the birds, the dogs, the trees. Talk about the sky and the clouds. Getting in the car? Talk through the process. At the store? Point out favorite foods, colors, shapes, and sounds. Be really intentional with your talk. Enjoying some screentime? That’s fine too. Talk about what you are watching. Name the characters and the objects, the animals, the colors. “Look! It’s Elmo! Elmo is red! We love Elmo!” Get them used to hearing descriptions of everything around them.

5. Introduce short, easy to pronounce words and use them often. Single syllable words work best to begin with. Use Consonant Vowel (CV) words like “GO”, “ME”, “NO”, Vowel Consonant (VC) words like “UP”, “IN”, “ON”, and Consonant Vowel Consonant (CVC) words like “CAR”, “HAT”, “RED”. Repeat words like these often and show the object or the color or the action. Encourage repetition.

In general, just talk. Include your littles in the everyday. Make a conscious effort to have regular conversations with them. Ask them questions. Model all sorts of talking. Try not to talk for them, or to let older siblings do so. Believe us, they will catch on. Give them the opportunity and they will start to talk. Give them lots of encouragement. Make talking exciting. They will be so proud of themselves and soon will be on the road to chatting up a storm.

Thank you for reading! Jill